1.
When I first traveled through time as a cave man I went to the Fire
Dept. and I said to the guy there "You know I've been trying for a long
time to make fire. I've tried rocks and sticks but it just hasn't
worked out for me. Do you have any fire here?" And they said no. Since
then I've been to every fire dept. I can find and none of them have
fire. I just didn't know it would be this hard.
2. Keep the Tennis Down
3. What the Huk?
4. Now it’s my turn to go in a straight line.
5. I love food so much I could eat it every day of my life and be satisfied.
6. I used to have a sweet tooth but then it fell out
because I ate too many sweets. Now I got a sweet tum and it gets bigger
and bigger with every sweet that I eat.
7. The bread is breaking us.
8. I had a close call and it made me wonder why they didn't just come over.
9. I was talking to one of my culturally ethnic
friends and apparently I said something insensitive and he accused me
of hate crime and I said "Yes I do hate crime."
10. Help! Help because I don't need any help! I just
feel like I need to be able to depend on someone and that I'm missing
out on a big part of life by only doing things on my own.
11. Quit laughing at my expense when you know I'm broke!
12. That guy was giving me a dirty look. Oh wait.. that was just a unibrow.
13. The men's restroom was out of order so I went
into the ladies room. Apparently it was the out of order sign that was
out of order.
14. [Siren Goes off] ..they still
haven't caught me yet. Don't get me wrong I'm not a criminal. That was
an ambulance. I'm just really sick.
15. I remember now.. y'know because I wasn't continually thinking about it before hand.
16. I wear a reverse mullet which means when I come
into a room the party gets started and when I leave everything is back
to business.
17. ThEnd Is JusThe Beginning